Please Knock Again

It’s been almost one month since I last blogged!! Hmmm, I’ve been quite gloomy lately, all stressed up with my FYP and finals until I don’t feel like doing anything and choose to lay my head in front of the laptop on my study table, as if like I’m experiencing some sort of serious depression. Hahaha!

I’m worried that I can’t complete my FYP on time, I’m worried that I don’t have enough time to prepare for my finals and, I’m worried that no company wanna hire me after I graduated, cuz my CGPA dropped drastically last year. I’ll be having my internship in Sept and I wish to have it in a MNC, I wouldn’t mind to travel far and stuck in a traffic jam for hours if I had the chance to work in a MNC cuz I’m curious as I’ve never been to one before. However, I found out that some of top companies required a minimum CGPA of 3.0 for internship. *Thunder* Based on my current CGPA, I think the chance of me having my internship there is just..... meh... not high.

You see, I’m not from a top or “branded” university so, -15%

But it’s okay that I’m not from a top university if I had good results.
Unfortunately my results are not good to compete with others. Hence -20%

Oh it’s ok if I have poor results as long as I have working experience right? Sadly, I have no working experience. -20%

And I’m not smart -20%

I’m not confident, I’ve no idea how to market myself during interview -20%

I have poor command of Engrish -20%

I’m not pretty -20%
Here’s an ugly truth, studies show attractive students get more attention, good-looking patients get more personalized care from their docs, and handsome criminals receive lighter sentences and beautiful people earn 12% more than Ugly Bettys! I should have studied harder since I don’t have good looks to rely on. ㅠ___ㅠ

I have an unattractive/ ugly resume -25%
First impression already PHAILED.

So the chance of me getting into a MNC is….. TADA!! -160%.
NEGATIVE 160 !! Zero !! ㅠ___ㅠ

They say “opportunity knocks but once” and “opportunity is also one of the things in life that once gone and never come back”. I sort of agree to this but not entirely. So, I was given a chance by my lecturer to “beautify” my resume last year to join the

PolyUGlobalInnovation&EntrepreneurshipChallengeInHK.

My group mate participated, but I didn’t *sobbbsss* and I’m glad that their proposal made it into top 30, defeated 10 countries and 48 proposals. And they are flying all the way to HK in June to compete with the other 14 countries! And besides this PolyUChallange, they also join other competitions using the same proposal. Throughout this whole participation thing, they learned and gained a lot, which make this become one of the worst decisions I’ve ever made besides quitting ballet and organ. You know, even though if they lost in the competition (choi!choi! I sincerely hope they will win!!) but those things they learned, those people they met, things they experienced, are priceless. Sigh~

I’m agree to this “when you believe that opportunity knocks but once, you make decisions based on fear”. I didn’t join that competition as I was afraid that I don’t have enough time to manage my studies, and also someone I don’t like, agreed to join but that person left half way though. This stupid FEAR I have, always haunt me when I need to decide. Arghhh!

There’s no use crying over spilt milk liao. Opportunity comes and goes, when it knocks over again, F*ck the fear! Grab it before it’s too late! Well, if it doesn’t knock, build a door!!

xoxo